New Set, New Audience, New City.........

Friends,

  
After many a week of comedic inactivity, we finally have movement!


As I mentioned, I was spending some time in the wee township of Picton. I don't know why, but NZ doesn't have villages, it has townships which I think make it sound very Victorian. Or Amish. The point is, I've left Picton now and am in windy Wellington in search of some work and/or money.

The Fringe Bar, the next venue
for me to conquer

After a little bit of research, I found an open mic night last Monday and dutifully attended with the aim of checking out the sort of stuff the locals find funny. It was at a venue called Fringe Bar which is located at the end of Wellington's uber-hip, uber-trendy Cuba Street (This means the guys wear tighter jeans than the girls and everyone has enormous headphones around their neck without ever actually listening to any music.). I have to say, it's a pretty decent set-up they have down there. I was kind of expecting a tiny bar with a microphone and stand in the corner of the room, but there is a decent sized stage, a sound booth, and it's well lit.


The open-mic night is called "Raw Meat Mondays" which makes it sound like the comedians are scared little lambs there for the taking, so I was apprehensive as to how the audience would handle people trying new material out. But they were great. I don't think I heard a single heckle. In fact the closest thing to a heckle was when the Mrs leaned in and whispered in my ear, "This. Is. Shit.". I wonder how she'll react to seeing me for the first time? In her defence, some of it was a bit shit.

This is what you look like if you hold a
piece of paper on stage

Because I'm pretty much a veteran on the comedy scene now I feel like I can say this - there are a few things I would change about the acts getting on stage. For starters, all of them took there notebooks and scribbled on pieces of paper on stage with them. I would make sure people didn't do this for a couple of reasons. Firstly it looks terrible when they have to keep referring to a sheet of paper to get a laugh. And secondly, when you are nervous, the sheet of paper in your hand shakes like a shitting dog and it screams out how nervous you are. Obviously these are just my opinions, but when I'm nervous I'd try anything I can to make it look like I'm not. Overall though, it was a really well run night and the standard of comedy is actually pretty good.


I was inspired to book myself in for a gig. So it's my pleasure to announce, on Monday 8th August, I will be making my New Zealand debut. Maybe sooner actually because I'm going to head down again tomorrow to see if there has been a slot open up. And on top of this, I will be trying out completely new material. I managed to sit down the other night and scour through all of the bits I have written down over the last couple of months, and have pieced together a new 5 minute set. It will need a lot of tweaking and at least 5 or 6 attempts at open mics before it becomes any good but I think it has potential.


I am pretty pleased to be back on the comedy train again after a couple of extended stops and hopefully it will all go well and I will have plenty to talk about in my next post.


On a quick final note, my aim for the blog is to make it an interactive thing where people will leave comments and what not, so if you happen to be reading this (and why wouldn't you be?) then write a comment. Even if you don't follow any blogs, stumbled onto it and never plan to return, it would be nice. You could say how much you think it's all a piece of poo or how you'll never get the 5 minutes it took you to read it back. I don't care.


If you have actually managed to read this blog all the way down to this point, let me be the first to congratulate you and thank you.



Now comment.

Are You Sitting Comfortably? Then I Shall Begin.......

Chaps,


    Just to put the world at ease, I'm not giving up comedy. I still want to carry on despite suffering a few performance lows over the last few weeks. Surely that shows some sort of commitment? At the very least it shows balls.
    
     I am pretty much done in Australia though. I have no gigs booked at all at the moment, and I am unlikely to get one with the whole Festival malarkey going on soon. I wasn't even going to go to the workshop this week as I didn't really see a point. I've decided that while I'm still in Oz, I'll concentrate more on rugby and then get back into comedy when I get to New Zealand. I did go to the workshop though and I'm glad I did. I found out that the workshop and open mic night at the Comic's Lounge would be closing over the next 6 weeks as of this Tuesday (22.03.11), but Robbie G, the guy who runs the 'shop, is going to open the Blah Blah Comedy Club, which he runs, as an open mic venue on Tuesdays, to keep giving new comedians a crack at it while the Festival is on. Now, this bares pretty much no relevance to me at all, except for the fact for the fact that due to the move of location, some of the acts who were pencilled in to have a gig over the next 3 weeks might not be able to make it. And I am officially top of the "reserves" list in case there are any drop outs. So there is hope of one more gig in Melbourne yet.
     Other than the workshop, I've been really lazy/unmotivated to see any comedy.


     So, as promised, in place of tales of the Melbourne comedy scene, here's a tale from my past that is humorous for nearly everyone except me...........


     When I was about 15 I discovered alcohol. But not in the "Sipping beer, in a pub garden, on a hot Summer's afternoon" way. More in a "Steal booze from your parents liquor cabinet and neck as much as you can, sat on a park bench, on a cold and wet November evening" kind of way. Me and my friends would all take something from home and meet up and get way too drunk than we should be. When I see kids do this now, I think they look like bell ends and I get slightly embarrassed that I used to be one of them.
     One particular night though I managed to get obscenely drunk and ended up in hospital. It's pretty shameful but it happened so whatever. Obviously I don't remember much, and I think I was pissed for about 3 days straight. Trust me, it sounds more fun than it was. You can't imagine the hangover I had. Anyway, I woke up in the children's ward of my local hospital wondering where I was and why there was a mural of teddy bears dancing on a rainbow in front of me. My Dad explained what had happened, I had a good cry, a couple of even better vomits, then decided it was time for my hangover humpty. That's hangover "poo" for anyone who isn't aware.
  
    I headed to the toilet, still drunk, wheeling along the drip drip bag that was attached to my arm. Sat down on the loo and started proceedings. I must of nodded off because the next thing I know the toilet door has been kicked down by a doctor and two nurses ready to resuscitate me. However I wasn't unconscious and in need of resuscitation, I was mid poo, trousers round my ankles, enjoying a much needed nap. What's more is the fact that they startled me so much that I fell off the seat and landed on the floor legs akimbo, bearing all to those in the room.

     I was very embarrassed, being 15 years old and dealing with puberty, but also very impressed with the professionalism that the hospital staff showed by holding in their laughter.......for all of about 5 seconds. All in all not a great weekend for me. But I did learn, that fateful night, that there is no point trying to keep up with others when drinking if you are a lightweight. I now know that after a brandy snap and a couple of wine gums, I've hit my limit.


     So that's that. Another week, another blog. Tune in next week for more embarrassing tales from my past and possibly other things that are more related to the purpose of this blog.


      Over and out.

                Sean

Nothing to do With Stand Up, But You Have to Admire His Use of Time and A Pretty Good Song.......