Dear All,
Seven more days have past which means I must have wonderfully entertaining tales and tit-bits from within the Melbourne comedy circuit for your reading pleasure. Tales of my own personal growth and development, tales of meeting fantastic global stars of comedy and tales of amazing opportunities presenting themselves before me. Well.......no. Not really. But kind of.
I want to start by mentioning something that I completely forgot to mention last week. And when I realised I had forgot to mention it, I actually did an animated slap of my forehead and nearly found myself shouting, "D'oh!". What can possibly be so important that forgetting it required an animated slap of the forehead I hear you cry? Well, last week, wait for it, I bought a new notepad. My Bible that had been my notepad, where I scribed all of my jokes and humorous observations, where I had penned my entire set, and where I had taken note of tips and advice from established comedians had basically filled up. It's my own fault really, I shouldn't have bought such a cheap little notepad in the first place. But how was I to know that 4 months later I'd even still be doing this, let alone would have written enough to fill a notepad?
But I am still doing it, and I did fill it. So I treated myself to a brand spanking new notepad that was thicker, had hard-back covers for protection, had lines to write on, and even had the luxury of page margins. It was at this time, stood in the queue at my local supermarket, holding my shiny black notepad, that I knew I was heading up in the world. Now if that story doesn't get you salivating with excitement and anticipation over what the rest of my week could have contained, you're crazy. But fear not, some stuff did actually happen that was slightly more notable than me buying a little notepad. For instance, there was a workshop and a guest speaker. I had a gig. I nearly died on stage during my gig. I snuck out the back door of my gig so I didn't need to face anyone. And finally, I booked myself in for another gig. And it's not even the end of the week yet!
The workshop was OK. Same old stuff that I'm beginning to get the feeling I don't need to go into too much detail about. "Has anyone had gigs?", "Who wants to try new stuff?", yadda yadda yadda, bla-dee bla bla. The interesting bit of the workshop came when our guest speaker, Col Cameron, piped up. He started by telling us how he made a living in comedy. Which is essentially MC-ing at corporate gigs and functions around the country while still doing the odd stand-up gig for extra pocket money. He also runs a comedy room with another comedian, but I have no idea where that is, or whether it's actually an earner for them or just a hobby. I found it quite interesting to learn there are ways of making money in comedy without doing paid stand-up gigs or moving into television.
The other thing he mentioned, was an old exercise he did when he was just starting out at a workshop like ours. He said the woman who was running the workshop got everyone to go on stage, say their names, where they're from and why they are doing comedy. The people watching would write down the name of the person on stage, and what role they would cast them in in a film e.g "The housewife", "The good looking one" etc. It turned out that there were ten or so people that weren't happy with how the majority of people watching perceived them. These people were cast as "The ugly one", "The one with dreadlocks", "The old one" etc. They wanted to be "The funny one" or something more relevant. As it happens, they were told, they were the acts that had the bigger chance of making it in comedy, because they had some distinctive feature that audiences could remember them by. We were told that unless you had some quirky look about you, or distinctive feature, you had to be pretty damn funny to make it. Which I'm sure a lot of people found very heartening to hear. But I don't have any distinctive features, other than my ginger hair and dazzling smile, so that means I have to be extra funny which seems a bit unfair to me. I'm considering taking a hot iron to one side of my face so I can be "The horribly scarred one". Then I don't have to try as hard.
This exercise Col talked about actually had some relevance to me because for the last couple of weeks I've been talking to a couple of the other guys about how I open my set. I have always opened with a joke. Not a typical stand-up joke. Just the sort of joke that you'd tell your mates in the pub. It's not always my joke either, just a joke I've heard. I'm not stealing or plagiarising the joke from another comedian, it's just a funny joke. My theory behind it is to give the audience something to take away with them. How many times have you told a funny story to someone that didn't get laughs because you either didn't tell it right or "You had to be there"? I don't want people to come and see me and leave saying "He was funny but what was it he said again?" By me telling them a joke, they can leave having that as pub ammo and inadvertently spread my name around. Then I can be "The one that said that joke". In my head it sounds like a good plan. But I know a couple of people I've mentioned it to think it takes away some of the humour from my own jokes by having one that isn't mine there. Also, if someone happens to have heard that joke already, they will wonder whether any of my material is my own. I can definitely see both sides of the story and haven't quite made my mind up which way to go yet. But for the time being I will continue by opening with a quick joke.
As I mentioned, I had a gig at the Comic's Lounge on Tuesday night (15.02.11).........It was a disaster. Not a disaster on the scale of Titanic, Hurricane Katrina or Global Warming. But definitely a disaster on the scale of the recent floods in Australia or the Egyptian riots. I had a feeling from way before I even got to the workshop that something not good was going to happen, so I made a point of reading through my set enough times that I could do it in my sleep, blindfolded and with ear muffs on.
The crowd wasn't that big this week, which was a relief to begin with. There was maybe forty or fifty people. The other thing that gave me confidence was that a few of the other people on that night were only doing there first or second gig. I know it sounds horrible, and I swear I do like the guys that went on, but I was really hoping at least one of them bombed so I would look even better. As it happens, I was the one that bombed. Funny old world isn't it. I failed on Tuesday for two reasons, the first being the fact that the punchline to my opening joke was the C-Bomb (That's C,U Next Tuesday for anyone that doesn't know). I learned the hard way that that word only works in certain audiences. Certainly not audiences mainly comprising of Mothers, Fathers and Grandparents of other comedians. I learned my lesson the hard way and won't be using that joke again. The other thing is, just an hour or so before I went on, I came up with two really good jokes to work into my routine. I knew exactly where they were going and it would make each joke that much better. It was just a case of remembering to put them in. The first one went swimmingly. I worked it in perfectly and everyone laughed. Even the second one I worked in flawlessly and it got a good reception. But while I was admiring how well my new jokes had gone down, stood on stage with the spotlights shining firmly on me, I had a total mind blank as to where my routine went next. This, of all weeks, was the first gig I'd decided I knew my set well enough to not feel the need to take my notes on stage with me. I was helpless, like a bunny in car headlights. I was silent on stage for what felt like a good 30 seconds. The crowd were equally silent except for the odd awkward cough or giggle at my despair. It even got to the point where I had to tell the audience they could talk among themselves and that this would be a good time to go to the bar because they weren't missing much. Actually, those comments did manage to get a bit of laughter and I finally managed to remember where the hell I was going and finished off my routine.
The most annoying thing about the whole situation was the fact that none of it was anybody else's fault except my own. I had no-one else to blame for my cock up, the crowd were good, there weren't any hecklers. There were no external factors in my failure. I guess it's good to get a failure under my belt though, I now know what to expect and how to deal with it. I can also learn from my mistakes and I can guarantee I won't be making them again. All new jokes get thoroughly rehearsed before performance, and all jokes containing offensive language gets chucked on the pile of all my other jokes that don't make the grade. So essentially, this gig was a useful learning curve for me and I intend to treat it as such.
If I edited out the two negative points, it was a really good gig. Like I said, the audience were good. They laughed at all my jokes at the right times and it could of been another victory under my belt. So I'm not too disheartened by the whole affair. I was at the time though. I didn't even want to go out to the bar because I didn't want to hear any ones opinions. So much so that when I left, I went out the back door. Bit childish really. I wasn't going to. I was going to wait until the last act had finished and sneak out when people had left. But I got talking to a guy called Mr.Alabama. He's an established African-American comedian in Melbourne to do a show at the Comedy Festival. He had some really constructive points for me and gave alot of advice. When I say he's African-American, I use the politically correct term. But this guy is a stereotype, and he knows it. And that's what makes him even funnier. We're stood in the green room chatting. Me, a pasty white, red haired English guy. And him, a big black guy from a ghetto in the deep South. It was ironic that he was the one who warned me off the C-Bomb when every other word that came from his mouth was either mother-fucker, bitch or pussy. He is a hilarious person though and a really nice guy. If you happen to be in Melbourne during the Comedy Festival, I'd recommend his show just to see him. I think he's playing at the Elephant and Wheelbarrow in the CBD. But I'm not sure when.
It was Alabama actually that told me to go out the back door. He can really talk and talk and as I politely as I could, I told him I had to go. To which he replied "Now you can't be going out the front with other cats on stage and shit. That shits just rude mother fucker. If you wanna leave you gone have to go out the back door". So I did. I didn't want to be rude and an incompetent comedian. So I snuck out the back, licking my wounds in a back alley of Melbourne.
The good news is that I have two more gigs coming up. The bad news is that they aren't until March. I have to try and get myself some more in the meantime because I don't want to have such a large gap between gigs. Especially as my last one didn't go so well. I want to get straight back up on the proverbial horse. I tried to pencil in some gigs at both M.I.B and The Exford Hotel but because the Comedy Festival is soon, the comedians that are doing shows here have booked warm up gigs at these places. Meaning I can't get a gig there until they've gone. Annoying. But I am going to try and scout out a couple of other venues I've heard about and see if I can get a slot there. So fingers crossed.
I've also learned that the Comic's Lounge is booked out for a private function next week so the workshop is off. At least I don't need to relive the horror of my gig I guess. So God knows what I will write about next week but I'm sure it will be just as genius as ever.
Until next time,
Sean
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Saturday, February 12, 2011
The Eye of The Storm .....
Hi Again,
It's been what has felt like a really long week for me. And next to nothing about it has anything to do with comedy. As I have previously mentioned, I have found work on Mondays and Thursdays working as a Picture Framer for a company round the corner to where I live at the moment. It's pretty straight forward work, the manager is a nice guy and I get paid cash. So it's all good there. So that was Monday and Thursday gone. I also went to the workshop on Tuesday night, followed by checking out a couple of acts down at Melbourne International Backpackers (or M.I.B as people call it, because it sounds cooler and is easier to say I guess) and then heading to Syn to watch a couple of acts there and book myself in to perform there during a competition that has already started. Tuesday night was a pretty busy night. Then, on Wednesday, my girlfriend dragged me along for a run, presumably because I've put so much weight on since travelling and she can no longer stomach the sight of my nude presence any longer. I also bought a bicycle in the afternoon and had to cycle it about 10 miles to get it home. And to top it off, I had a rugby game on Wednesday night. Just to tip me over the edge if I wasn't already mid-way through a coronary. Wednesday done, and I was beginning to feel a bit drained. Cue Thursday. Thursday I worked at the picture framers, then had rugby training, immediately followed by (without so much as stopping for a shower) cycling into the city to watch a couple of guys at the Exford. Then cycling home in a thunderstorm at nearly midnight. Thursday done and "a bit drained" was turning into "fucking knackered". On Friday, I started my 3 day adventure into the world of floristry, or floristism as I put it on Facebook, pruning 8,000 red roses a day ready for the Valentines Day rush. No shit, 8,000. This involved me waking up at 5.00am, cycling the 8 miles into the city, starting at 6.00am working through til 2.00pm and cycling home to immediately collapse on the bed and get some shut eye. The process was repeated today (Saturday) and will be again tomorrow (Unless I'm dead from fatigue by then).
So that was my week. And I apologise for not having the time or energy to update the blog closer to when the comedic side of things actually happened. However I do have a memory like Rainman, so sit tight, and I'll walk you through this weeks comedy journey.
Tuesday followed Monday as it so invariably does, and it was workshop time. I had had the gig the week before but had already decided to not put my hand up when asked "Who's had gigs?". Maybe it was just the mood I was in but I felt I had analysed my performance enough and didn't really feel the need to talk it through with anyone now. I was pretty keen to try out a few of my new gags I'd spent the previous couple of days writing, but I didn't even get the chance to do that. It's funny, when we are asked who wants to get up and try new stuff, nobody wants to go first, but after that initial person gets up, it's like a dogfight to get on stage. Everyone wants to have a go and you almost need to play Rock, Paper, Scissors or flip a coin or something to see who goes next. I wasn't aggressive enough or passionate enough about making an effort to get up so I kept quiet and sat in my place. I figured eventually everyone who wants to have a go, will of been up and it will be my turn. But there are always a couple of people that have spent the last week on holiday or something and have written a set the size of the Bible, and expect to be able to go through the whole thing. One woman even had to be stopped by Robbie and told she'd taken up too much time and to make it shorter. I didn't particularly like this woman, I found her to be very self-important, overly confident to the point of cockiness and patronising to the people who tried to give her feedback. After another lady had given her two very valid, and not-rude-at-all points of feedback, she responded with "Sweetie, this is my first time trying this stuff out. I'm sure your stuff wasn't that great first time around either, darling". Personally, I found her rude, made worse by the fact she wasn't in the slightest bit funny. But I promise this blog isn't going to be a bitchy rant like last week. So let's move on....
We did have a guest speaker this week. A comedian called Jed Cogley came in to give us a few tips, advice and answer any questions. Apparently he's had a long and successful comedy career which has included TV, radio and touring all over the world. I haven't had the time to Youtube him yet but I'm sure he's on there if you fancy having a look. He gave some very good advice about how to communicate with an audience, remembering material and generally keeping an audience on your side throughout a performance. He was also a really nice guy and I hope he comes along again to help out in the future.
After the workshop, I got the tram down to M.I.B because a) I wanted to check it out and b) My very good friend Dil Ruk was performing there that night so I went to show my support. I was never going to stay long because I needed to get to Syn to pencil myself in a gig. Dil was 4th on and, in my opinion, had a good gig. The crowd were alot livelier than I'd been lead to believe. I had expected nine or ten backpackers, split between being stood at the bar and playing pool on one of the tables, not caring what was going on on-stage, just trying to have a beer a get laid. In reality I was only half right. There were these nine or ten people, but there were also 15 or so people there specifically for the comedy. It's nice to know someone is at least listening. And it's very easy to get disorientated mid-set when a joke doesn't get the expected laugh. Which is what I was dubious about before going there. But actually I will probably try and get a gig there soon.
Coincidentally, if you search "Dil Ruk" on youtube, you should come across a funny parody he's written to the tune of "Danger-Zone", that song from Top Gun. Check it out because it's pretty good. I want to write a parody myself but never have the time or resources. Maybe in the future.
After M.I.B I briskly walked to Syn and was hoping to pop in, book myself a gig, then go home. But I got there just after the intermission so had to wait until it finished at 11pm to speak to the guy. It was OK though, because Syn are running a competition at the moment where you can win a gig at a big comedy club in Melbourne, and bag an interview on a radio show here. It isn't necessarily a massive prize but still would be nice to win. They are running it in four heats. The winner of each heat goes into a semi final, then into the final. Obviously. Tuesday was the first heat, and I'm booked in to be on in the fourth heat. Each member of the audience is given a sheet with every performers name on it. Then they score each of them (I guess out of ten), the act with the highest score wins. I guess this rules out everyone voting for their friends, because if each act brings five friends, mathematically, their best score will be from their friends and scores from non-friends will be low. If anyone else is good, their score will be consistently high therefore will win. I think I've made the process sound alot more complicated than it is. There were some pretty good acts on that night though and I think the standard will remain pretty high so it won't be an easy thing to achieve for whoever eventually wins.
As mentioned earlier, I also went to the Exford on Thursday with the intention of booking myself a gig there. But the guy that runs it wasn't there so it was almost a wasted journey. I say almost, Dil was on again and so was another friend, Greg McDonald. So I got to see them so it wasn't all bad. And at least I have incentive to go back again next week to book my gig. There were a couple of hecklers in the audience at the Exford. But they were friendly, coked up, smacked up, rough as fuck, born and raised in a shed in the country by their Mum and Dad/Grandad type hecklers. They just wanted to get involved and be heard and seen. They weren't so much hecklers, more annoying fucks who need to learn to to shut the fuck up. Hopefully I won't have to deal with anyone like that when I gig there!
What is next on my agenda? Well, I have a gig on Tuesday night at the Comic's Lounge, which I'm semi-looking forward to. My gig there last time went OK and I'm hoping to get the same amount of laughs this time around. Although I'm sure the audience will be a bit smaller this time. I am also going to try and get a gig elsewhere between now and my gig at Syn, which isn't until the 1st March. Hopefully I can keep gigs ticking over and maybe incorporate some of my new material into my current act. I feel like I'm in the eye of a comedy storm at the moment because I had a few gigs in a row, but I haven't had one for a couple of weeks now, and then I do have some more booked soon. So I need to try and stay sharp with my material and be ready for the upcoming gigs. By the time I leave Melbourne, I'd like to have enough good, tried and tested material to last a fifteen minute set.
So I'll update again next week and I'll maybe have some new revelations regarding gigs and if I'm heading in the right direction.
Speak to you all soon,
Sean
It's been what has felt like a really long week for me. And next to nothing about it has anything to do with comedy. As I have previously mentioned, I have found work on Mondays and Thursdays working as a Picture Framer for a company round the corner to where I live at the moment. It's pretty straight forward work, the manager is a nice guy and I get paid cash. So it's all good there. So that was Monday and Thursday gone. I also went to the workshop on Tuesday night, followed by checking out a couple of acts down at Melbourne International Backpackers (or M.I.B as people call it, because it sounds cooler and is easier to say I guess) and then heading to Syn to watch a couple of acts there and book myself in to perform there during a competition that has already started. Tuesday night was a pretty busy night. Then, on Wednesday, my girlfriend dragged me along for a run, presumably because I've put so much weight on since travelling and she can no longer stomach the sight of my nude presence any longer. I also bought a bicycle in the afternoon and had to cycle it about 10 miles to get it home. And to top it off, I had a rugby game on Wednesday night. Just to tip me over the edge if I wasn't already mid-way through a coronary. Wednesday done, and I was beginning to feel a bit drained. Cue Thursday. Thursday I worked at the picture framers, then had rugby training, immediately followed by (without so much as stopping for a shower) cycling into the city to watch a couple of guys at the Exford. Then cycling home in a thunderstorm at nearly midnight. Thursday done and "a bit drained" was turning into "fucking knackered". On Friday, I started my 3 day adventure into the world of floristry, or floristism as I put it on Facebook, pruning 8,000 red roses a day ready for the Valentines Day rush. No shit, 8,000. This involved me waking up at 5.00am, cycling the 8 miles into the city, starting at 6.00am working through til 2.00pm and cycling home to immediately collapse on the bed and get some shut eye. The process was repeated today (Saturday) and will be again tomorrow (Unless I'm dead from fatigue by then).
So that was my week. And I apologise for not having the time or energy to update the blog closer to when the comedic side of things actually happened. However I do have a memory like Rainman, so sit tight, and I'll walk you through this weeks comedy journey.
Tuesday followed Monday as it so invariably does, and it was workshop time. I had had the gig the week before but had already decided to not put my hand up when asked "Who's had gigs?". Maybe it was just the mood I was in but I felt I had analysed my performance enough and didn't really feel the need to talk it through with anyone now. I was pretty keen to try out a few of my new gags I'd spent the previous couple of days writing, but I didn't even get the chance to do that. It's funny, when we are asked who wants to get up and try new stuff, nobody wants to go first, but after that initial person gets up, it's like a dogfight to get on stage. Everyone wants to have a go and you almost need to play Rock, Paper, Scissors or flip a coin or something to see who goes next. I wasn't aggressive enough or passionate enough about making an effort to get up so I kept quiet and sat in my place. I figured eventually everyone who wants to have a go, will of been up and it will be my turn. But there are always a couple of people that have spent the last week on holiday or something and have written a set the size of the Bible, and expect to be able to go through the whole thing. One woman even had to be stopped by Robbie and told she'd taken up too much time and to make it shorter. I didn't particularly like this woman, I found her to be very self-important, overly confident to the point of cockiness and patronising to the people who tried to give her feedback. After another lady had given her two very valid, and not-rude-at-all points of feedback, she responded with "Sweetie, this is my first time trying this stuff out. I'm sure your stuff wasn't that great first time around either, darling". Personally, I found her rude, made worse by the fact she wasn't in the slightest bit funny. But I promise this blog isn't going to be a bitchy rant like last week. So let's move on....
We did have a guest speaker this week. A comedian called Jed Cogley came in to give us a few tips, advice and answer any questions. Apparently he's had a long and successful comedy career which has included TV, radio and touring all over the world. I haven't had the time to Youtube him yet but I'm sure he's on there if you fancy having a look. He gave some very good advice about how to communicate with an audience, remembering material and generally keeping an audience on your side throughout a performance. He was also a really nice guy and I hope he comes along again to help out in the future.
After the workshop, I got the tram down to M.I.B because a) I wanted to check it out and b) My very good friend Dil Ruk was performing there that night so I went to show my support. I was never going to stay long because I needed to get to Syn to pencil myself in a gig. Dil was 4th on and, in my opinion, had a good gig. The crowd were alot livelier than I'd been lead to believe. I had expected nine or ten backpackers, split between being stood at the bar and playing pool on one of the tables, not caring what was going on on-stage, just trying to have a beer a get laid. In reality I was only half right. There were these nine or ten people, but there were also 15 or so people there specifically for the comedy. It's nice to know someone is at least listening. And it's very easy to get disorientated mid-set when a joke doesn't get the expected laugh. Which is what I was dubious about before going there. But actually I will probably try and get a gig there soon.
Coincidentally, if you search "Dil Ruk" on youtube, you should come across a funny parody he's written to the tune of "Danger-Zone", that song from Top Gun. Check it out because it's pretty good. I want to write a parody myself but never have the time or resources. Maybe in the future.
After M.I.B I briskly walked to Syn and was hoping to pop in, book myself a gig, then go home. But I got there just after the intermission so had to wait until it finished at 11pm to speak to the guy. It was OK though, because Syn are running a competition at the moment where you can win a gig at a big comedy club in Melbourne, and bag an interview on a radio show here. It isn't necessarily a massive prize but still would be nice to win. They are running it in four heats. The winner of each heat goes into a semi final, then into the final. Obviously. Tuesday was the first heat, and I'm booked in to be on in the fourth heat. Each member of the audience is given a sheet with every performers name on it. Then they score each of them (I guess out of ten), the act with the highest score wins. I guess this rules out everyone voting for their friends, because if each act brings five friends, mathematically, their best score will be from their friends and scores from non-friends will be low. If anyone else is good, their score will be consistently high therefore will win. I think I've made the process sound alot more complicated than it is. There were some pretty good acts on that night though and I think the standard will remain pretty high so it won't be an easy thing to achieve for whoever eventually wins.
As mentioned earlier, I also went to the Exford on Thursday with the intention of booking myself a gig there. But the guy that runs it wasn't there so it was almost a wasted journey. I say almost, Dil was on again and so was another friend, Greg McDonald. So I got to see them so it wasn't all bad. And at least I have incentive to go back again next week to book my gig. There were a couple of hecklers in the audience at the Exford. But they were friendly, coked up, smacked up, rough as fuck, born and raised in a shed in the country by their Mum and Dad/Grandad type hecklers. They just wanted to get involved and be heard and seen. They weren't so much hecklers, more annoying fucks who need to learn to to shut the fuck up. Hopefully I won't have to deal with anyone like that when I gig there!
What is next on my agenda? Well, I have a gig on Tuesday night at the Comic's Lounge, which I'm semi-looking forward to. My gig there last time went OK and I'm hoping to get the same amount of laughs this time around. Although I'm sure the audience will be a bit smaller this time. I am also going to try and get a gig elsewhere between now and my gig at Syn, which isn't until the 1st March. Hopefully I can keep gigs ticking over and maybe incorporate some of my new material into my current act. I feel like I'm in the eye of a comedy storm at the moment because I had a few gigs in a row, but I haven't had one for a couple of weeks now, and then I do have some more booked soon. So I need to try and stay sharp with my material and be ready for the upcoming gigs. By the time I leave Melbourne, I'd like to have enough good, tried and tested material to last a fifteen minute set.
So I'll update again next week and I'll maybe have some new revelations regarding gigs and if I'm heading in the right direction.
Speak to you all soon,
Sean
Thursday, February 3, 2011
The Video Review......
To whom it may concern,
Yet another week has past, and for anyone that gives the slightest shit about my life outside of stand-up, I have found a part time job. I left the UK to come travelling because I felt stuck in a job I didn't enjoy. That job was picture framing. The job I have just got, is picture framing. That has to be some sort of irony or karma or some shit. The difference here is that I'm thankful for the money and would've given my left nut for a job so I won't grumble.
On the comedy front a few things have happened. And a few things haven't. I still haven't had a call from The Ellen Show yet. Personally I think she's bordering on rude now. There has also been no mega money deals or even so much as an offer to be in an advert for piles cream. This whole saga is taking longer than exprected. But I will be patient.
In terms of what has happened, there was another workshop on Tuesday for starters. Frankly I'm running out of original and new things to say about the workshop. It's pretty much the same routine every week. I had my gig "reviewed" from the week before. I think people thought it was OK, they again said there was a friendly and responsive audience which made it easier for the performers. When they said it, I couldn't help but think "Fuck you, maybe we were all just funny and you're fucking jealous", I also thought how good it would be to put on a good performance in front of a bad crowd and see what they thought then. In retrospect I wish I had never had that thought. I had a gig on Tuesday night at Syn and, let's just say, it wasn't a good crowd. But I'll talk more about that later. I also made the mistake of mentioning I had 5 or 6 beers to calm my nerves. At which point half the people there looked at me as if I'd just shat on their kids presents on Christmas Day. It was a look of shock, disgust and disappointment. I just wanted to try and take the edge off, is that so bad?
The other observation I wanted to make about the workshops recently, is that there have been a group of 5 or 6 girls and guys turn up together. They call themselves a "Comedy Troop" and are apparently putting on a show soon. The thing is, they remind me of some sort of drama school graduates who all think they are each the most hilarious people on earth. They have created a very exclusive group within the workshop where they sit together and talk through everyone elses time on stage, but when one of them go up, they cheer, whistle and laugh. Not a normal chuckle either. I'm talking proper over the top belly laughs like some terrible movie villain. Which brings me to my next gripe with the "Comedy Troop". We only have about an hour or so of time for everyone to get up on stage and try new things. It isn't long really and most people are courteous enough to only run over a couple of gags to see what people think. But these guys get up one by one and do a full 5-10 minutes each. Look, I don't have anything against these guys. They're probably very nice people and they are funny, some of them. The thing is, I get really wound up listening to 45 minutes of fake belly laughs and verbally patting each other on the back. To be honest their show can't come soon enough so they can crawl back into whatever trendy coffee shop they came out of.
I feel better getting that off my chest. Now on to more positive things. Like me. I had a gig at Syn, as mentioned and it was the first gig where I have not needed about 6 poos before hand. Not to say I wasn't nervous but I think I'm making in roads. Now, Syn isn't a huge venue and isn't really known for its comedy nights. So it is never really packed. Usually there are between 20-30 people there, mostly made up of two or three friends of each comedian on that night. But Tuesday was empty. There were probably more people in the kebab shop downstairs than there were watching the comedy. And the 9 or 10 that were there, were mostly comedians who weren't there to laugh. They were there to sit quietly and read through their material alone until it was their turn on stage. I knew I was in for a tough night when Michael McConnell, the MC for the night didn't get big laughs. He's a very funny guy who performs in front of pretty big crowds at various venues across Victoria, NSW and the ACT and has been doing stand-up quite a long time.
To make things worse, I was on 9th. Or second to last. Or if you want to be as intelligent as me, I was the penultimate act. So I had to sit and watch nine comedians perform to silence and wait for my turn to do the same. And I need to stress, when you're on stage with a spotlight shining in your eyes, you can't see a thing past the light and when you don't hear anything, you just want to duck down, squint and cover the light from your eyes with your hand just to check there are people still in the fucking room. So, when it was my turn, I got up, started my routine, and to my delight the audience did actually laugh a bit. Not so much laughs more of a titter. Even that might be exaggerating but I guess it's better than nothing. The problem with this gig though was that I decided to ad-lib a few jokes at the end of some of my other jokes. And even when the ad-libs were funny, I would spend the next five seconds pondering how good my added on joke was, then forget what I was saying next, spending another five seconds looking like a bunny in the headlights while I tried to pick up where I was. Some of my ad-libs were also horrendous. To which I made the mistake of doing more ad-libs to dig myself out of a whole. The primary example of this being this; One of my jokes begins with me saying how I am not very well endowed. My ad-lib was to say that I blame my Dad. However, seeing as I attended school, I know that male genetic traits are equally as likely to come from the mother's side as the father's. This all went through my head, and I didn't want to seem ignorant, so I followed that up with "Or my Mum's side". Suddenly, I realised saying I got my small penis from my Mum may make her out to be some sort of transvestite, or maybe the audience might think my Mum has a particularly large clitoris or something. Neither of which I wanted to portray. So, having all this running through my head, while on stage, my final come back was "I hope I didn't get my small cock from my Mum". This all left me not only looking like a bell-end, but a bit confused as to what I was supposed to say next. I did, however, pull myself through the gig and I'm pleased to say that not only have I experienced my first difficult audience, I have fucked up my routine for the first time. Although I don't think many people noticed the fuck up. I did though.
I have also video recorded my last two gigs (I will put them on here as soon as I can) so I can actually look back and see what went well and what doesn't go so well. It's funny, the mind manages to do a really good job of blocking out horrible moments in your life. Like when you're stood on stage in front of 250 people and not a single person laughs at your joke. Luckily for me, I have video evidence to help me never forget! I really thought that I had nailed my routine at the Comic's Lounge a couple of weeks ago. On reflection, I made a couple of errors, missed out parts from the script, and talked over punchlines. On top of that, some jokes didn't get a laugh. It's good to be able to look back and see where you can improve. In contrast, I felt my gig on Tuesday was a disaster and had totally cocked it up and rushed through the whole thing in about 2 and a half minutes. But having watched the video, it lasted a respectable four and a half minutes, and people didn't noticed my wierd ramblings too much, they actually laughed at them as though they were a part of the performance. The laughs weren't very loud though, I mean, how loud can 7 people be? So watching it back makes it feel like nobody was laughing, but I was just pleased to hear something other than crickets and far off church bells in the background.
Next up for me then? I have another gig booked in at Comic's Lounge on the 15th February, there is a stand-up comedy competition running at Syn which I want to get myself involved in. There are also another few venues I am going to start exploring and getting gigs at such as the Exford, Deathstar, Spleen and MIB. They all sound like delightful places to be and I can't wait to perform there. I am also officially allowing my girlfriend to come and watch me at the Lounge too. And if that goes well, I may invite other friends along to watch me strike comedy gold as well. So.......
Stay safe, don't do drugs, look both ways when crossing the road, wipe back to front and genrally take care.
Sean
n.b If you're reading this and are not yet following my blog, please do so. It makes me feel popular and successful so please feed my ego. Thank you.
Yet another week has past, and for anyone that gives the slightest shit about my life outside of stand-up, I have found a part time job. I left the UK to come travelling because I felt stuck in a job I didn't enjoy. That job was picture framing. The job I have just got, is picture framing. That has to be some sort of irony or karma or some shit. The difference here is that I'm thankful for the money and would've given my left nut for a job so I won't grumble.
On the comedy front a few things have happened. And a few things haven't. I still haven't had a call from The Ellen Show yet. Personally I think she's bordering on rude now. There has also been no mega money deals or even so much as an offer to be in an advert for piles cream. This whole saga is taking longer than exprected. But I will be patient.
In terms of what has happened, there was another workshop on Tuesday for starters. Frankly I'm running out of original and new things to say about the workshop. It's pretty much the same routine every week. I had my gig "reviewed" from the week before. I think people thought it was OK, they again said there was a friendly and responsive audience which made it easier for the performers. When they said it, I couldn't help but think "Fuck you, maybe we were all just funny and you're fucking jealous", I also thought how good it would be to put on a good performance in front of a bad crowd and see what they thought then. In retrospect I wish I had never had that thought. I had a gig on Tuesday night at Syn and, let's just say, it wasn't a good crowd. But I'll talk more about that later. I also made the mistake of mentioning I had 5 or 6 beers to calm my nerves. At which point half the people there looked at me as if I'd just shat on their kids presents on Christmas Day. It was a look of shock, disgust and disappointment. I just wanted to try and take the edge off, is that so bad?
The other observation I wanted to make about the workshops recently, is that there have been a group of 5 or 6 girls and guys turn up together. They call themselves a "Comedy Troop" and are apparently putting on a show soon. The thing is, they remind me of some sort of drama school graduates who all think they are each the most hilarious people on earth. They have created a very exclusive group within the workshop where they sit together and talk through everyone elses time on stage, but when one of them go up, they cheer, whistle and laugh. Not a normal chuckle either. I'm talking proper over the top belly laughs like some terrible movie villain. Which brings me to my next gripe with the "Comedy Troop". We only have about an hour or so of time for everyone to get up on stage and try new things. It isn't long really and most people are courteous enough to only run over a couple of gags to see what people think. But these guys get up one by one and do a full 5-10 minutes each. Look, I don't have anything against these guys. They're probably very nice people and they are funny, some of them. The thing is, I get really wound up listening to 45 minutes of fake belly laughs and verbally patting each other on the back. To be honest their show can't come soon enough so they can crawl back into whatever trendy coffee shop they came out of.
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| The terribly pixelated poster for comedy at Syn (Apologies) |
To make things worse, I was on 9th. Or second to last. Or if you want to be as intelligent as me, I was the penultimate act. So I had to sit and watch nine comedians perform to silence and wait for my turn to do the same. And I need to stress, when you're on stage with a spotlight shining in your eyes, you can't see a thing past the light and when you don't hear anything, you just want to duck down, squint and cover the light from your eyes with your hand just to check there are people still in the fucking room. So, when it was my turn, I got up, started my routine, and to my delight the audience did actually laugh a bit. Not so much laughs more of a titter. Even that might be exaggerating but I guess it's better than nothing. The problem with this gig though was that I decided to ad-lib a few jokes at the end of some of my other jokes. And even when the ad-libs were funny, I would spend the next five seconds pondering how good my added on joke was, then forget what I was saying next, spending another five seconds looking like a bunny in the headlights while I tried to pick up where I was. Some of my ad-libs were also horrendous. To which I made the mistake of doing more ad-libs to dig myself out of a whole. The primary example of this being this; One of my jokes begins with me saying how I am not very well endowed. My ad-lib was to say that I blame my Dad. However, seeing as I attended school, I know that male genetic traits are equally as likely to come from the mother's side as the father's. This all went through my head, and I didn't want to seem ignorant, so I followed that up with "Or my Mum's side". Suddenly, I realised saying I got my small penis from my Mum may make her out to be some sort of transvestite, or maybe the audience might think my Mum has a particularly large clitoris or something. Neither of which I wanted to portray. So, having all this running through my head, while on stage, my final come back was "I hope I didn't get my small cock from my Mum". This all left me not only looking like a bell-end, but a bit confused as to what I was supposed to say next. I did, however, pull myself through the gig and I'm pleased to say that not only have I experienced my first difficult audience, I have fucked up my routine for the first time. Although I don't think many people noticed the fuck up. I did though.
I have also video recorded my last two gigs (I will put them on here as soon as I can) so I can actually look back and see what went well and what doesn't go so well. It's funny, the mind manages to do a really good job of blocking out horrible moments in your life. Like when you're stood on stage in front of 250 people and not a single person laughs at your joke. Luckily for me, I have video evidence to help me never forget! I really thought that I had nailed my routine at the Comic's Lounge a couple of weeks ago. On reflection, I made a couple of errors, missed out parts from the script, and talked over punchlines. On top of that, some jokes didn't get a laugh. It's good to be able to look back and see where you can improve. In contrast, I felt my gig on Tuesday was a disaster and had totally cocked it up and rushed through the whole thing in about 2 and a half minutes. But having watched the video, it lasted a respectable four and a half minutes, and people didn't noticed my wierd ramblings too much, they actually laughed at them as though they were a part of the performance. The laughs weren't very loud though, I mean, how loud can 7 people be? So watching it back makes it feel like nobody was laughing, but I was just pleased to hear something other than crickets and far off church bells in the background.
Next up for me then? I have another gig booked in at Comic's Lounge on the 15th February, there is a stand-up comedy competition running at Syn which I want to get myself involved in. There are also another few venues I am going to start exploring and getting gigs at such as the Exford, Deathstar, Spleen and MIB. They all sound like delightful places to be and I can't wait to perform there. I am also officially allowing my girlfriend to come and watch me at the Lounge too. And if that goes well, I may invite other friends along to watch me strike comedy gold as well. So.......
Stay safe, don't do drugs, look both ways when crossing the road, wipe back to front and genrally take care.
Sean
n.b If you're reading this and are not yet following my blog, please do so. It makes me feel popular and successful so please feed my ego. Thank you.
Friday, January 28, 2011
The "Green Room"......
Hello again,
So...........Another week has past. For me that means another week of living on the breadline of being an unemployed backpacker. I've been looking for some kind of work now for a month and so far all I've managed to get was a day lifting box after box after box of legal paperwork down two flights of stairs and loading it into a truck to be transported to a new office. I did this for 8 and a half hours and the woman paid me $60. I nearly gave her a slap, tore it up and spat in her face, but fortunately for me I have the foresight to see that $60 is enough to buy me about 200 packets of 2 minute noodles, and I'm told food is a necessity. I was also well aware that no matter what pittance she decided to pay me, it was better than sweet F.A (which I think is the technical term for my current salary). My days are currently filled with applying for shit jobs I really don't want, but really really need, social networking, and watching TV and movies. And yet I still manage to spend money everyday! I have no idea how but my bank account has whittled away to almost nothing in just under a month.
What does this have to do with comedy I hear you all ask? Nothing. I just want you to understand the pickle I'm in and how the workshop and gigs have become a sweet release from the reality of unemployment and borderline depression. It's not comedy anymore, it's therapy.
However, some note worthy things have happened to me since we last spoke. I have been to another workshop, had another gig and been to an open mic event that I haven't been to before. This one is on a Thursday at The Exford Hotel on Russell Street. I went for two reasons really. One - To check out the standard of other comedians I may not have seen before (just to see how I shape up). And two - To scope the venue out as a potential gig for myself. As far as the standard of comedians go, it was pretty good. There were some very funny people there. A definate step up from Syn Bar. I'm not sure how I would do there but it is definately a place I will book a gig at once I'm a bit more sure of myself and my work. In terms of a venue, it's pretty cool. There is a plain brick wall as a backdrop to the stage (the kind of brick effect that some venues use as a pattern on a curtain as a backdrop), and the lighting is pretty good, the room doesn't go pitch black except for a spotlight shining in your eyes. However I noticed some real drawbacks to the places I've been to before. For starters, The Exford is a pub, meaning people haven't necessarily gone there to see comedy. There were a couple of groups of people who were clearly just there for a few pints and felt the need to force out their conversations over whoever was on stage at the time and some of them decided after a few pints that they were funnier than the comedians and would heckle. Nothing offensive, but still pretty fucking annoying. I personally feel that that would intimadate me as a performer at the moment, I don't have the experience or confidence to be dealing with arse holes like that. I feel like my only tactic would be to take the teachers approach of "If you have something so important to say little boy, then come up to the front of the class and say it". But other than that, I think the Exford will be somewhere I will gig sooner than later.
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| Me doing my set and obviously being hilarious |
As mentioned, there was also a workshop on Tuesday. Good numbers attended again and I was confident of getting up and trying my new stuff out. But it seemed everyone had that idea and as I waited patiently for my turn, we simply ran out of time and had to move on. Since the first workshop of the New Year, I've had high hopes for where it could take me. We were all told that this year, the Comic's Lounge was going to make more of an effort to get guest speakers down to each session to coach and advise us on any issues we want to discuss. I was pretty excited about getting to pick the brains of some of Melbourne's best and brightest acts. But in the following weeks I haven't actually seen anyone. On Tuesday the guy who was supposed to come just didn't show up, not the most professional, and if I could remember his name I'd make sure I didn't show up at his gigs too. I have no idea if anyone came the week before, I had to leave early to take my girlfriend to the aquarium. Lame excuse but hey-ho. But the other thing mentioned at that first session of the year, is that the Lounge will be looking to push comedians further, and will be offering the best ones some Wednesday and Thursday night gigs. This was, and still is, a pretty exciting prospect for me (And I imagine for everyone there) because it would mean a leap from doing open mic gigs where anyone can have a go, to doing proper gigs in front of paying audiences. I don't know if they are paid gigs or not but it would be handy in my current situation! Time will tell I guess whether any of what they said was true.
The other, much bigger, much more personal, and much more relevant to this blog story is that I had my SECOND GIG after the workshop on Tuesday. The reason this is much bigger news isn't that is was another gig. It was that (unknown to me until people arrived), the restaurant was serving food at an open mic night for the first time ever. I've been to open mic nights at the Comic's Lounge before and have never seen a bigger crowd than about 50 or so people so I doubted serving food would have made little difference to the size of the audience. But couple that with the fact nobody had work the next day due to it being Australia Day, it made the audience unbelievably huge. For me anyway. I had only done one gig in front of an audience of approximately 25 in a dark, back alley bar in China Town. Now I was about to gig at a proper comedy club in front of a full audience of around 250 people! I really felt more confident about my set until I saw the hoards of expectant people arrive. Then suddenly fear struck me like a fucking lightning bolt, I starting getting the sweats again and couldn't stop needing a drink (swiftly followed by not being able to stop needing a piss). The really cool thing about playing at the Comic's Lounge though is the set-up. Everything is very professional. Before I went on, I was sat reading through my materal with a beer in the green room. The line up that night was made up of very very established comics who have done tonnes of TV, radio and fringe festival shows. I found myself in some pretty impressive company and I really wish I hadn't drank so much to calm my nerves so I could remember who they were! But, really, who would of thought three months ago that I would find myself sipping beer in the green room of a comedy club with a bunch of TV personalities. Not me.
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| The Green Room of the Comic's Lounge |
My thoughts on the gig iteslf are mixed. The audience laughed at my jokes which was a good thing so I was very happy to have made a large audience laugh. But when I'm nervous I have a tendency to rush what I'm saying. This time I purposefully did exactly the opposite to slow it down and make it more controlled. I left nice big gaps between jokes and gave the audience plenty of time to laugh. But in my opinion I think that may have made it look patchy. Like sometimes I couldn't remember my lines. I hope this wasn't the case but I guess I'll find out on Tuesday at the next workshop. Fingers crossed that I don't get another "Yeah, easy audience" comment. I also got one of the guys to film my set on his phone so I could see how it went. I haven't had a chance to see it yet but that will be a good indicator to how it went.
So this coming Tuesday I'm on at Syn Bar again. I'm a bit dubious as to whether to do exactly the same thing I did there a couple of weeks ago. I think the fact they will have seen it already will take away the funniness. But then again, I don't have anything else to do so tough titties. It will be a good test of how funny my material actually is if I can make the same people laugh with the same material again. We shall see.
One other very quick point. I've been wondering if I should change the name I go on stage to. Currently it's just my name, Sean Gorman. But when I'm messing about and telling jokes with mates I always refer to myself as Sean Michael Gorman, as in "You wouldn't catch Sean Michael Gorman doing that" or "No-one can resist Sean Michael Gorman". I don't make a habit of reffering to myself in the third person but when I do, and I use my middle name as well, it seems to make what I'm saying funnier. So I'm considering using it as my comedy name to see how it goes down. Or is it going to just make me look sound like a bell end? I'll ask around and get back to you.
Once again, I will check in next week to explain what went well and what went wrong and we'll see if we can improve. I will also hopefully of booked myself in for a few other gigs too to keep the whole experience ticking over.
All my love,
Sean
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| The audience (and size of it) at the Comic's Lounge during my gig |
Monday, January 24, 2011
The Reviews Are In.....
Dear All,
The lack of new postings are down to one thing..... laziness. Plain and simple, I had shit to do so haven't been on to post a new, informative, intriguing, thought provoking and down right hilarious update to the Comedy Journey in over a week now.
I went to the workshop last Tuesday (18.01.11), and was actually a bit nervous. Probably as much as I was when I first attended the workshop. Having had my first gig on the previous Tuesday, and knowing that my audience was made up of some of the more established comedians from the area, I was hoping to get lots of feedback from them regarding my gig. I was more hoping someone to say "Wow, your gig was amazing, I've put in some calls and you've got a slot on Saturday Night Live and Ellen DeGeneres wants you on her show for an in-depth interview into your struggles to make it to the top". I was a bit disheartened when that never happened.
Obviously I didn't really expect that, but a few verbal pats on the back and some "well dones" would have been well received. I would have even settled for some constructive criticism, seeing as normally when we go into the "Who's had gigs" section, we talk for a good few minutes about each one, talking about how new material went down, what the audience was like, people who were there chip in with how they feel it went and each gig gets dissected and evaluated. I was hoping that would happen in my case so I have some direction of how to improve my one and only set.
The turn out to the workshop was pretty huge compared to usual. Tonnes of new people turned up (probably to make good on New Year Resolutions to try something new), there were also some faces I'd never seen before but who have returned after a break from comedy, but I was slightly annoyed that there didn't seem to be anyone I recognised there except the guy who runs it (Robbie G). Now, the reason I was annoyed is because these are the people that I was hoping would praise me for a job well done, but because they weren't there, all my hopes laid on the guy who runs the workshop to tell me how good I was (He saw my gig). When it was my turn to talk about how my gig went, I told them I think it went OK, but I have nothing to compare it to so only time would tell. This was the queue for the Rob to interrupt me and say "No way, that was a good gig, you were funny and you got plenty of laughs", but actually all he said was "That's fair, it was an easy audience, they were very responsive". How shit is THAT?! I thought it went really well, all things considered. I had people come up to me after the gig telling me so. So surely something better could have been said than that?
I'm not one to dwell on the past, so it hasn't shaken my confidence (or lack of). I still have at least two more gigs pencilled in, one of which is this Tuesday actually at the very impressive setting of Comic's Lounge in North Melbourne. I'm quite looking forward to this one because the room is so professional (lighting, seating arrangement, stage etc etc), although I'm 1,000,000% sure that this will make me more nervous on the night. I'm even going to take my camera and get people to take pictures and videos, which I'll try and put on here as and when I can. So anyway, like I said, it hasn't changed my enthusiasm but it did temporarily give me stage paralyis. By that I don't mean stage fright or anything, but I wanted to try some new material out to everyone and because of my "stage paralysis" (and partially my caution due to the new faces) I decided against it. Or to word it slightly more accurately, I pussied out. Onwards and upwards I suppose.
So in summary, my next is gig this Tuesday (Shit, it's been out of my mind for a while and I can't seem to get my head around the fact that it's not this Tuesday.....It's TOMORROW!!), and then I have another one booked in for the following Tuesday. By that time though I fully expect my offer for Saturday Night Live. I will try my very best to get some form of photos, if not a video on here so you can at least make a judgement for yourself about me. And I will be heading to the workshop to see if I have enough testicles to try new stuff out. It's been brewing inside me now for a couple of weeks so I think it's time to let the cat out of the bag.
That reminds me actually, I still have at least three more personal hurdles to jump which are worth a mention. I am yet to let my lovely girlfriend see me perform yet. I am slightly hesitant on account of how my rehearsal in front of her went, I believe "Why don't you try a parody?" were her exact words. But I will get her down to see me soon as I think she's had to put up with the workshops, rehearsals, constant scribbling of notes and, of course, a blog to write. She may as well get to see the end product. The next hurdle is having the confidence to perform in front of friends outside of the workshop. Nobody actually knows I do it so doing it in front of them will be tough first time around, another thing I will have to address as I get deeper into the whole thing. The last thing is, as already touched upon, I haven't told anybody about my venture into comedy. The reason I started it is because I'm on the other side of the world, where I have the comfort of being able to try new things without being judged or commented upon by the people whose judgements and opinions I care most about. So at some point soon (ish) I'm going to have to tell my family, friends, ex-workmates and team-mates from my rugby club that I now stand up in front of audiences in Melbourne and try to make them laugh, or snigger at least. How that will go down I have no idea!
So yeah, that's this weeks update. Stay tuned in for more ramblings from a man out of his depth.
Stay safe,
Sean
The lack of new postings are down to one thing..... laziness. Plain and simple, I had shit to do so haven't been on to post a new, informative, intriguing, thought provoking and down right hilarious update to the Comedy Journey in over a week now.
I went to the workshop last Tuesday (18.01.11), and was actually a bit nervous. Probably as much as I was when I first attended the workshop. Having had my first gig on the previous Tuesday, and knowing that my audience was made up of some of the more established comedians from the area, I was hoping to get lots of feedback from them regarding my gig. I was more hoping someone to say "Wow, your gig was amazing, I've put in some calls and you've got a slot on Saturday Night Live and Ellen DeGeneres wants you on her show for an in-depth interview into your struggles to make it to the top". I was a bit disheartened when that never happened.
Obviously I didn't really expect that, but a few verbal pats on the back and some "well dones" would have been well received. I would have even settled for some constructive criticism, seeing as normally when we go into the "Who's had gigs" section, we talk for a good few minutes about each one, talking about how new material went down, what the audience was like, people who were there chip in with how they feel it went and each gig gets dissected and evaluated. I was hoping that would happen in my case so I have some direction of how to improve my one and only set.
The turn out to the workshop was pretty huge compared to usual. Tonnes of new people turned up (probably to make good on New Year Resolutions to try something new), there were also some faces I'd never seen before but who have returned after a break from comedy, but I was slightly annoyed that there didn't seem to be anyone I recognised there except the guy who runs it (Robbie G). Now, the reason I was annoyed is because these are the people that I was hoping would praise me for a job well done, but because they weren't there, all my hopes laid on the guy who runs the workshop to tell me how good I was (He saw my gig). When it was my turn to talk about how my gig went, I told them I think it went OK, but I have nothing to compare it to so only time would tell. This was the queue for the Rob to interrupt me and say "No way, that was a good gig, you were funny and you got plenty of laughs", but actually all he said was "That's fair, it was an easy audience, they were very responsive". How shit is THAT?! I thought it went really well, all things considered. I had people come up to me after the gig telling me so. So surely something better could have been said than that?
I'm not one to dwell on the past, so it hasn't shaken my confidence (or lack of). I still have at least two more gigs pencilled in, one of which is this Tuesday actually at the very impressive setting of Comic's Lounge in North Melbourne. I'm quite looking forward to this one because the room is so professional (lighting, seating arrangement, stage etc etc), although I'm 1,000,000% sure that this will make me more nervous on the night. I'm even going to take my camera and get people to take pictures and videos, which I'll try and put on here as and when I can. So anyway, like I said, it hasn't changed my enthusiasm but it did temporarily give me stage paralyis. By that I don't mean stage fright or anything, but I wanted to try some new material out to everyone and because of my "stage paralysis" (and partially my caution due to the new faces) I decided against it. Or to word it slightly more accurately, I pussied out. Onwards and upwards I suppose.
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| The venue for my next adventure |
That reminds me actually, I still have at least three more personal hurdles to jump which are worth a mention. I am yet to let my lovely girlfriend see me perform yet. I am slightly hesitant on account of how my rehearsal in front of her went, I believe "Why don't you try a parody?" were her exact words. But I will get her down to see me soon as I think she's had to put up with the workshops, rehearsals, constant scribbling of notes and, of course, a blog to write. She may as well get to see the end product. The next hurdle is having the confidence to perform in front of friends outside of the workshop. Nobody actually knows I do it so doing it in front of them will be tough first time around, another thing I will have to address as I get deeper into the whole thing. The last thing is, as already touched upon, I haven't told anybody about my venture into comedy. The reason I started it is because I'm on the other side of the world, where I have the comfort of being able to try new things without being judged or commented upon by the people whose judgements and opinions I care most about. So at some point soon (ish) I'm going to have to tell my family, friends, ex-workmates and team-mates from my rugby club that I now stand up in front of audiences in Melbourne and try to make them laugh, or snigger at least. How that will go down I have no idea!
So yeah, that's this weeks update. Stay tuned in for more ramblings from a man out of his depth.
Stay safe,
Sean
Friday, January 14, 2011
More sweat than anyone could have imagined........
Welcome again,
So as I mentioned last time, I was not 100% sure if my gig was going to go ahead, if I'd misheard the date of the gig, or if I'd imagined the whole thing and it was never going to happen. All I knew is that the comedy workshop at the Comic's Lounge was resuming again after the Christmas hiatus, and some of the guys I knew from there had gigs pencilled in for that night. So I decided the best plan of action was to attend the workshop, then head down to Syn Bar to see if I was going onstage or not.
It's probably easier to follow if I start at the top and talk about the workshop first and then the talk about what occurred at Syn. The workshop was back and I was pretty keen to get back involved so I left in plenty of time to get there. The other reason for leaving early was because I really needed 15 minutes of quiet time to go through my routine in my head because as it stood, I was two hours before a potential gig and still couldn't remember all of my jokes. Turns out, surprise surprise, you can't rely on public transport. I never got my 15 minutes and only just made it in time, so I decided the next best thing to do would be to get up on stage during the workshop and go through my routine in front of everyone (although I really didn't want to, I was nervous enough, effectively doing two gigs in one night may have given me a coronary!). In my head, the worst option to have taken would of been to not get on stage and rehearse my routine. That would have left it to the last minute of learning my jokes and put further pressure on me. Turns out, that's exactly what I did. I totally bottled getting in front of people and sat quietly throughout the entire workshop, which not only made me more nervous but made me feel like a complete wimp too (how was I going to get on stage and perform for strangers if I couldn't do it for friends?!).
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| Elephants are scared of mice, not fat chicks |
The workshop went on, as it usually does, by starting with people talking about gigs they've had, which was none seeing as everywhere had shut down over the Christmas period. We then went on to inviting people onto the stage to try out new material they have written. I'm only going into so much detail about the workshop because it was it at this time that, to me, the funniest thing of the evening happened. A female comedian who has been around for a little while got on stage to try some new stuff. To briefly describe her, she's about 5' 4" and is of a larger, shall we say, frame. But because she has blonde hair and clear skin, she is the sort of larger lady that believes she can pull off short skirts and revealing tops (that bares no relevance to the story, I just want to paint an image). Anyway, in her new material, she talks about how her bedroom is very messy and she found a mouse in it the other day and she got scared. When she finished, the audience were invited to comment, ask questions or constructively criticise. The words that came out of the mouth of the first guy to comment not only took the girl on stage by surprise, but made the entire room turn to look at him in disbelief that he'd said it. In his words: "No reflection on you, but when you mentioned a mouse I was hoping you'd go on to mention how elephants are scared of mice". I have to say for a comedian, she got alot more defensive than I'd expected. Usually comedians can laugh at themselves. But she responded with "How, exactly, is that no reflection on me? What, exactly, are you trying to say?". The guy that made the comment visibly sank in his seat, apologised and promised the room he'd be quiet. It's not often I exerience an awkward silence that I didn't cause, and frankly it was very nearly not silence at all because I was ready to piss myself laughing!
Onward to the moment of truth, was I to have my very first gig? Not only a gig, but the very first time I'd addressed an audience. To say the tram ride into the city was nerve racking was an understatement. I was cacking my pants at the mere prospect.
I got to the venue and immediately hunted down the organiser to find out if I was on. He confirmed I was, indeed, to be performing and not only that, but I was opening the second act. The only positive I could see at the time was that I wasn't on first and that, maybe, the audience would be drunk enough to find me funny by the time I got on. The build up to my debut was a bit of a blur. It seemed to go particularly fast as I frantically read through my material. I wasn't ready. Not only did I not know my lines, I didn't even look ready. I was sweating beyond belief, we're talking gi-normous sweat patches under each armpit, a big one on my back and beads of sweat dripping down my forehead. I promise this is no exageration that my palms were so sweaty, my fingertips went wrinkly. My notebook of jokes has water stains on the pages and the ink has run. I genuinely thought I was close to that coronary.
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| I wish I was only sweating this much |
To my amazement, not only did I manage to remember EVERY SINGLE JOKE, but the audience actually laughed at every single joke. I put this down to three factors. Firstly, I think I was correct in saying there had been plenty of drinking time to lubricate the senses of the audience. Secondly, I think my British accent fooled the audience into thinking I'm an established comedian gigging in Australia, which naturally makes them more open to allowing themselves to find me funny. And lastly, and probably leastly, maybe I was pretty funny. Only time will tell I guess.
I was so relieved I could of pissed myself. I guess you can't win in those situations, you piss yourself through fear then piss yourself through relief. But there were definately more positives to come from the it and at least I have a good idea of what to expect now. Having said that..... I guess I should mention what's in store for me next. Well, I have my SECOND EVER GIG already booked for the 25th January at the Comic's Lounge in Melbourne. I'm already alot more confident going into this one and hopefully it will go just as well as the last. Also, I have another gig pencilled in at Syn on the 1st February. So in the space of a month I will have gone from never having done a gig, to having done three. Exciting times ahead me thinks. I also have some new material I've been writing that I might try at the workshop in the coming weeks. Whether that is any good is still to be seen.
I'll catch all you comedy lover's and wannabees next time,
Sean
Saturday, January 8, 2011
The gig is nearly upon me.......
Hi chums,
It's been a bit longer than I would usually like between posts, but it's difficult because the workshop finished for the year about 3 weeks ago and doesn't start until this Tuesday ( 11th January). The gigs at Syn finished at the same time so I have been completely out of touch with anyone and everyone from the comedy circuit. In other words.....I have no idea what's going on.
My only real link to stand up is my old house mate, Dil, who has been in Sri Lanka for the past month for Christmas and New Year and doesn't get back until the 16th. He's usually the go-to guy if I have any questions or need to contact anyone, but like I say, he's out of reach. That's left me a bit stranded really because I'm 99.9% sure my FIRST EVER GIG is on the 11th (I thought I booked it in for Tuesday the 10th but that doesn't seem to be right so I'm making an assumption). Because of my slight doubt that I have a gig booked, I've tried sending a couple of e-mails to the organiser of the evenings to see if he can clarify. Turns out he likes to be awkward and not get back to people. I've also tried "facebooking" anyone I can find who goes to the workshop to see if they know, but all they know is that Open Mic starts again on Tuesday. It's made preparing for it pretty hard to be honest. While everytime I think about it I suddenly feel the need to empty my bowels, another part of me doesn't even think I'll be doing it. Add that to the fact that over Christmas I have done zero rehearsals and I can't remember half of my routine, and I think we have a recipe for disaster.
It's wierd, I've known for ages I had this gig pencilled in. But I've spent more time writing more material than focusing on the stuff I already have. Everytime I think "Right, let's sit down and read through my routine", I then decide I've got plenty of time to do it another day. What doesn't help is that in my head, my gig is in 2011. So despite the fact I don't know it by heart with 2 weeks to go, in my head I'm going "What's the rush, the gig isn't 'til next year!".
So that's about it. That's all the updates I have for now, I guess the next time I write I will of not only attended another workshop, I will of done my first gig too! And you'll be the first to know how it goes!
Lots of hugs and kisses,
Sean
It's been a bit longer than I would usually like between posts, but it's difficult because the workshop finished for the year about 3 weeks ago and doesn't start until this Tuesday ( 11th January). The gigs at Syn finished at the same time so I have been completely out of touch with anyone and everyone from the comedy circuit. In other words.....I have no idea what's going on.
My only real link to stand up is my old house mate, Dil, who has been in Sri Lanka for the past month for Christmas and New Year and doesn't get back until the 16th. He's usually the go-to guy if I have any questions or need to contact anyone, but like I say, he's out of reach. That's left me a bit stranded really because I'm 99.9% sure my FIRST EVER GIG is on the 11th (I thought I booked it in for Tuesday the 10th but that doesn't seem to be right so I'm making an assumption). Because of my slight doubt that I have a gig booked, I've tried sending a couple of e-mails to the organiser of the evenings to see if he can clarify. Turns out he likes to be awkward and not get back to people. I've also tried "facebooking" anyone I can find who goes to the workshop to see if they know, but all they know is that Open Mic starts again on Tuesday. It's made preparing for it pretty hard to be honest. While everytime I think about it I suddenly feel the need to empty my bowels, another part of me doesn't even think I'll be doing it. Add that to the fact that over Christmas I have done zero rehearsals and I can't remember half of my routine, and I think we have a recipe for disaster.
It's wierd, I've known for ages I had this gig pencilled in. But I've spent more time writing more material than focusing on the stuff I already have. Everytime I think "Right, let's sit down and read through my routine", I then decide I've got plenty of time to do it another day. What doesn't help is that in my head, my gig is in 2011. So despite the fact I don't know it by heart with 2 weeks to go, in my head I'm going "What's the rush, the gig isn't 'til next year!".
So what have I been doing? Well, working mostly. My glamorous job as a car detailer came to an end on New Year's Eve as I had worked for my employer for the maximum time allowed according to my visa. So due to the fact I knew I wasn't going to have an income soon, I worked my arse off over the Christmas period. I did get a couple of days off to relax, like Christmas Day, but that was a wasted day off. I'm travelling with my girlfriend so it's just us here. I don't have any family in Australia, nor does she. And the few friends we have made here either went home for Christmas, or had moved on to their next backpacking destination. So, essentially, we spent Christmas alone. It was nice but we aren't the sort of people to plan things. We thought we'd play it by ear and hopefully find a pub that was open to have a drink and maybe even a roast dinner. But reality was very different. We walked down to where the main road of pubs and restaurants are near us and nothing was open. However the trams were running on Sunday timetable, so, in all our wisdom we decided to take a tram ride and see where it took us. This may sound like a spontaneous and potentially fun filled journey but it was not. It took us half an hour up one very long road, which we spent looking out the window at all the closed shops, the half an hour back down again. By this time we were pretty peckish so we stopped for some food. Where did we have our Christmas Lunch I hear you ask? ..........Hungry Jacks. That's Burger King for anyone not in Australia currently. Yep, I had a double whopper with cheese for Christmas dinner. How depressing.
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| The Christmas Lunch I'd been dreaming of. |
So basically, I didn't spend my Christmas learning my routine, or anything constructive for that matter. I spent it cleaning cars and eating Hungry Jacks.
The other thing I thought I'd mention, which I kind of touched on earlier, is how nervous I get when I think about my gig. I think it's natural to be nervous and I think it will end up being ok, but until yesterday I hadn't shown my girlfriend any of my routine. Mainly because I'm aware of the fact my material is mainly about sex and willies which I knew she would think is crude and aiming for a cheap laugh. But I decided I'd practice in front of her for the first time last night.........it wasn't what I was hoping for. Her first reaction was, "why don't you write a parody instead?". When I explained that I wasn't going to go in a whole new direction less that a week before my gig, her response was "It just wasn't very long and I only got one joke". Like I said, this wasn't how I wanted her to react. I wanted her to flat out lie and tell me it was hilarious and I was going to kill it. But she didn't, and now I'm more nervous than ever.So that's about it. That's all the updates I have for now, I guess the next time I write I will of not only attended another workshop, I will of done my first gig too! And you'll be the first to know how it goes!
Lots of hugs and kisses,
Sean
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